I just noticed the mods declined my original reply to this message, Helga, so I'll try again but I agree with you. If a man is writing to multiple women, he probably has not taken the time to really get to know any of them that well. As you said, if he goes to meet more than one, it's almost guaranteed that they will know.

For the men that have months of communication with many women and try to visit them all, I don't see how that would work out very well for anyone.